Social media channels are buzzing about an article in The Cut, New York Magazine’s digital publication. Written anonymously by a woman who recently gave birthThe book details the cruel and inhumane treatment she inflicted on her cat after her children were born.
The purpose and reality of the story
The article was meant to show how having a family can change your relationship with your pets. However, her treatment of her cat Lucky revealed a shocking lack of consideration for a creature she once claimed to love. She forgot to give Lucky food or water for long periods of time. She made Lucky’s litter box so dirty that he was forced to relieve himself on the floor. She left Lucky ungroomed and dirty. She failed to seek medical attention when his unhealthy diet caused dental problems.
Being ignored is bad enough, but the pure anger and hatred she displays towards her former companion is heartbreaking, and it’s clear how heartbroken Lucky must have been to be pushed aside when he desperately needed affection. The author claims that cats, including Lucky, lack affection, but it’s clear that he loved her. The cat couldn’t understand what had changed; in fact, the author writes that she would leave her apartment window open in the hope that Lucky would jump or fall to his death.
The story was so shocking that social media heavyweights tried unsuccessfully to track down the author in an effort to give Lucky a decent home. The Cut prefaced the article with a disclaimer that Lucky is safe, but many are skeptical.
Who do we become when we become parents?
The truth is, having kids changes your relationships with pets — or anyone, really. But your emotional core doesn’t change under the stress, long hours, and new reality you thrust yourself into without fully understanding the impact it will have. In fact, it deepens. If you’re a good person who has loving relationships with the people around you, you’ll continue to act in ways that show that love. Even if you’re cold toward them or irrationally angry because you’re sleep-deprived and your baby is screaming, if you can just take a moment to breathe, the love will still be there for you, and they will feel it too.
Except for a brief moment at the end, the writers showed no sign of this.
The character portrayed by this artist
As you read through the article, you get the impression that the main reason she got Lucky was because she was a lonely single woman in her 20s. She wanted someone to love her unconditionally (not the other way around). At first, she doted on Lucky. She showered him with obsessive affection. And he got used to sleeping on her head every night and benefiting from her disposable income.
Not surprisingly, after all that attention, Lucky became very attached to the woman. She claims cats are not affectionate companions or anything like that. So when her boyfriend-turned-husband showed up, Lucky became territorial. The woman dismissed the issue as “annoying, but something everyone could handle.” She never explored ways to make Lucky more receptive to the new man. She didn’t realize how much chaos a change in relationship would bring to the cat’s life. One wonders if she really cared about Lucky, or if he was just a living toy to be discarded when something new showed up.
Reading that, it makes sense that things would get worse for Lucky once the baby was born. Sure, pets can suffer well-intentioned neglect after a child joins the family, but this woman’s tone was spiteful. Postpartum depression or something worse? Who knows, but the way she reacted to the cat was not healthy, especially for Lucky.
The story we really needed
Yes, an article about the changing status of pets after a baby is born is important, and it should be featured to help new parents and let them know that they’re not crazy or bad people if they don’t feel exactly the same way about their pets after the birth. However, The Cut should not have published this article. It normalizes cruelty and a lack of compassion. Anyone who truly loves pets and has empathy would never treat an animal the way this writer treated Lucky.
Instead of writing about my hatred for a cat I thought I once loved, I should have gone to see a psychiatrist and found Lucky a new home with someone who understands cats better than I do.
